Exploring the historical rules of tea etiquette and the traditional afternoon tea decorum that is quintessentially British.

Etiquette certainly is a part of the tea’s tradition, but rules have changed centuries since and have become more relaxed especially in America. Dunking the biscuit and extending the pinkie finger are some old customs surrounding tea but this afternoon delight has has developed to become more popular in the states and a more relaxed social event.

Lets start with the Napkin – When seated for tea, the truly formal way is to place your napkin on your lap with the fold towards you. Under no circumstances should a napkin be left on a chair, if excusing yourself from the table, then the napkin should be set back to the left of the plate. Did you know that at the end of dining, by neatly folding the napkin with a crease and placing it back on the left of the plate, that’s an indicator to the host that you wish to be invited back.

Now the tea – This endeavor is called afternoon tea — a pleasurable afternoon affair of small savory and sweet bites accompanied by tea — not high tea, which is considered an early evening supper. When preparing your tea there are many ways in which you can tailor the drink to your own personal tastes, whether that be the addition of lemon, sugar or milk, but one thing stands, you must remember to stir correctly. You do not stir in a circular motion, clinking your spoon against the china. Place your spoon in a 6 o’clock position in the cup and fold the tea towards the 12 o’clock position, back and forth. Whilst making sure not to ‘clink’ the spoon against the sides of the cup. You must also remember to not leave the spoon in the cup, instead placing it on the saucer to the side of the cup. 

Let’s dive into the food – a 3 tiered tray of goodies that consist of scones, finger sandwhiches and petit fours. There is some debate on which item to start with – scones or finger sandwiches. Some places serve scones on the bottom tier and others serve the finger sandwiches. Just remember to eat from the bottom tier up — all foods should be eaten with your fingers.

“SC-ON” OR “S-CONE”, however you may pronounce it, there is a specific order to eating it. Split the biscuit in half with your hands, not your knife. Start with the bottom half, spreading the jam and preserves first then the clotted cream on top. It is jam first then clotted cream but if served a warm scone it is ok to put the clotted cream on first so it may seep into the scone.

Table manners – It’s customary for the person doing the hosting to pour the tea and for the teapot to be left on the table with the spout facing the person who poured. If sat at a table, the proper manner to drink tea is to raise the tea cup, leaving the saucer on the table, and to place the cup back on the saucer between sips. The risen pinkie finger, once considered a sign of class and elegance is now one of the most common faux pas of afternoon tea.